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Return of Inspector Blixeau..

Adventures of Inspector Blixeau (in reverse chronological order):
Click:  
[20031121-01] [20031003-01] [2003-06-11] [2003-04-22] [2003-04-12] [2003-03-15] [2003-03-11] [20030308] [2003-03-03] [2003-01-27] [2003-01-18] [2002-12-08] [2002-11-19] [2002-11-18] [2002-11-13] [2002-11-08] [2002-10-30] [2002-10-02]








·Return of Inspector Blixeau:  Click here for cartoon with audio.
·Shot in the Dark:  ·Version 1(smaller)· ·Version 1(larger)· ·Version2··
·Hans Blix as Sgt. Blix in the new Reality TV show:  Dubya's Inspectors-- click here·
·How/why Blix became the UN's Chief Weapons Inspector:  Click here..
·Blixeau in the Dark:  Click here·

.
Nov. 21, 2003:  PoliSat .Com's Political Satire/ Commentary   Daily Update # 01·· ™©·2003 ·(posted Nov. 24)·
The dreams of Blixeau for hist'ry's tableau... ·

"My book," says Inspector Blixeau,
¹
"will soon become hist'ry's tableau
on how Blair and Bush
were wrong when they pushed
for orders for warfare to go."

"Since dubya-M-D's weren't detected,
to me there'll be statues erected
as soon as the Baathists
again rule Iraqis
to celebrate freedom ejected."

Such legacy dreams of Blixeau
will dominate hist'ry's tableau
as soon as Berlin
prefers once again
a wall between East/West plateaus.·
··
·
Inspired by a November 20, 2003, news report of an interview with Hans Blix, in which Blix explains his plans to write a book explaining his view of how history will view Operation Iraqi Freedom as an illegal war rather than one leading to the spread of freedom in the Middle East.  Blix's expectations of being vindicated by history are about as good as similar hopes of those who mocked Reagan's stubborn insistence on increasing and modernizing our nuclear forces as an incentive for the Soviet Union to ultimately capitulate to his demands for reducing nuclear weapons rather than merely continuing the decades-old pattern of limiting increases in such weapons.  
¹·"Inspector Blixeau" is the name I coined for U.N. Weapons Inspector Hans Blix.  For more about Inspector Blixeau, go here. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·
Direct link for this Update: ·
http://polisat.com/du2003/du031130.htm#20031121-01 · ™©2003 .
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..
··
 Oct.3, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/ Commentary  Daily Update # 01·· ™©·2003 ··

Preemption preeminence beats last-resort immanence... 

To those with delusions of prescience,
the danger to peace wasn't imminent
from
Saddam's Iraq,
so Bush they attack
for making preemption preeminent.

To think we're sufficiently prescient
to wait until danger is imminent
before launching Rangers
at gathering dangers,
our only defense would be imm
anent.

The critics say: "Threats must be imminent
before plans for war we should implement,"
but seeking perfection
in timing protection
leads not to success but impediments.

Though critics in Nine-One-One's wake
said "Dots were connected too late,"
they're quick to forget
in countering threats,
it's better too soon than too late.
··
··

The "there-was-no-imminent-danger" critics of Operation Iraqi Freedom as an imperialistic "preemptive war" base their argument upon the specious contention that our intelligence services can be prescient enough to allow us the luxury of waiting for a danger to become "imminent" before taking action against it, yet those same critics are the ones who most loudly proclaim the ineffectiveness of our intelligence services.  Bush never claimed an attack directly against us by Iraq was "imminent."  Instead, he correctly described the circumstances as a "gathering danger" that would continue to grow absent removal of Saddam Hussein.  David Kay today publicly described his team's still-classified mission as not yet having found operational weapons of mass destruction. 
However, the media (and the critics) have ignored his statements that his team has found massive evidence of capabilities and plans for such weapons and evidence of extensive violations other serious weapons limitations (such work in progress on missiles with a range of 1,000 kilometers) not detected by the vaunted Inspector Blixeau.  (By the way, the last two stanzas are from my January 29, 2003, Daily Update.) --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·
Direct link for this Update: ·
http://polisat.com/du2003/du031031.htm#20031003-01 · ™©2003 .
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..
··
June 11, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary  Daily Update #01··™©·2003·
·
From Rumsfeld instructions to Blix for dastardly quote to be fixed;
Did Rumsfeld tell Blix where to go to learn he's Inspector Blixeau?.
·

The Guardian quoted Hans Blix
as claiming that Pentagon tricks
portrayed him as though
Inspector Clouseau
was really his name 'stead of Blix.

But later when Rumsfeld et al 
denied they had mocked him at all,
corrections by Blix
said sources of tricks
were private, not Rumsfeld et al.

Perhaps he told Blix where to go
to learn what he seemed not to know:  
T'was PoliSat-Com's
satirical wand
that dubbed him "Inspector Blixeau."*··
·
·
The Guardian published a June 11, 2003, article based on an interview with Hans Blix headlined "Blix:  I was smeared by the Pentagon."  The article quoted Blix as having said the "bastards in Washington" had been trying to smear him and undermine him during the inspection period preceding Operation Iraqi Freedom.  After worldwide dissemination of the article, Blix told a Fox News reporter that when he referred to "bastards in Washington," he meant private individuals rather than Pentagon officials.  As a private individual, I plead guilty to satirizing Blix as Inspector Blixeau.  ·
*·For the Adventures of Inspector Blixeau, go here.  --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·
Direct link for this
Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2003/du030630.htm#20030611-01·™©2003.
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..
··
 April 22, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update #01··™©·2003····
Blixeau's self-delusion as wunderkind 
whose mission by Dubya was undermined.
.

    Blixeau,* who believes he's a wunderkind,
    in claiming by Bush he was undermined
    pretends that confessions
    revealing the weapons
    through terror weren't totally undermined.·
·
··
Inspired by an April 22, 2003, news report touting Hans Blix's claims that his inspection regime was "undermined" by Bush.  Ostensibly, Blix still suffers the delusion that the will of Iraqi scientists to tell him the truth was not totally undermined by threats of torture and death directed toward them and their family members by Saddam's secret police.
·
*·Beginning last October, I recognized Hans Blix to be the UN's version of Inspector Clouseau, so I re-named him accordingly and chronicled his actions here as the adventures of "Inspector Blixeau." --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·
Direct link for this
Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2003/du030430.htm#20030422-01·™©2003.
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..
··
April 12, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary  
Daily Update #01·
·™©·2003··
·
From Blix more pronouncements to show 
he's really Inspector Blixeau.
·

    That Pentagon "planning" for "war" had begun
    before the "inspections" by Blix had begun
    was cited by Blix
    as proof "war" was picked
    as end-game before Blix's work had begun.

    Naivety rather than knowledge he shows
    with statements revealing how little he knows,
    'cause prudence demands
    contingency plans
    designed just in case there's an order to "Go."

    If "thinkers" like Blix were in charge of our freedom
    they'd never have "war-plans" 'til after they need 'em.
    Too late they would see
    such planning to be
    too little, too late for protecting our freedom.

    Naive accusations by Blix merely show
    how little he knows what inspectors should know
    and buttress my theory
    of needs to be leery
    of Blix 'cause he's really Inspector Blixeau.*···
·
·
Inspired by an April 12, 2003, news report of an interview of Hans Blix by Spanish news media.  According to the report, Blix said Iraq was paying a "a very high price in terms of human lives and the destruction of a country when the threat of banned weapons could have been contained by UN inspections."  With stunning naivety, he also said:  "There is evidence that this war was planned well in advance. Sometimes this raises doubts about their attitude to the [weapons] inspections." The article says "the 74-year Swedish diplomat made clear that he believes he was misled by President Bush."  It further says, "In a scathing attack on Britain and the US, Mr. Blix accused them of planning the war 'well in advance' and of 'fabricating' evidence against Iraq to justify their campaign.  Thank goodness people who think like Blix are not in charge of defending our freedoms. 
*·To learn how and why Hans Blix became the UN's Chief Weapons Inspector for Iraq, click here.  --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·

Direct link for this
Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2003/du030430.htm#20030412-01·™©2003.
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..











··
March 15, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update #01··™©·2003··
·
Blixeau's Knowledge Diet is snappy:  Keep saying "Don't Worry, Be Happy."·····

Blixeau knows his job's to give warning
of weapons Saddam is still hording
but told MTV
the "danger" he sees
ain't war but instead "global warming." 
·
·
Inspired by a March 14, 2003, news report of Hans Blix's (aka Inspector Blixeau) comments to an MTV "reporter," in which Blix contended he worries more about "global warming" than nuclear weapons. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·






Direct link for this
Update: ·polisat.com/du2003/du030331.htm#20030315-01·™©2003.
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..
··
March 11, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update #01··™©·2003··
·
Blixeau* has begun to hide smoking guns.····
·
Blixeau showed his "fairness" as weapons inspector
when Powell by him at the Council was hectored
contending Saddam
was "going along"
to help him t'ward ending his job as inspector.

In praising Saddam 'cause he owned-up
to weapons as soon as they've shown-up
Blixeau has displayed
his knowledge of ways
to focus on holes in the doughnuts.·
·

Inspired by Blix's obliviousness to his real task as evidenced by his decision to exclude from his oral report to the Security Council last Friday the fact that the inspectors had found pilot-less planes and customized bombs designed to disperse chemical and/or biological weapons. *·Blixeau is the name I coined for Inspector Hans Blix last October due to my expectation that his job performance would resemble that of Inspector Clouseau.  For more Adventures of Inspector Blixeau, go here--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·

Direct link for this Update: 
·
polisat.com/du2003/du030331.htm#20030311-01·™©2003.
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..


··
March 08, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update #01··™©·2003··
·
Inspector Blixeau has perfected his act... in swallowing elephants; straining on gnats.·· ··


 Inspector Blixeau has perfected his act
 in swallowing elephants; straining on gnats
 and praising the grudging
 concessions of fudging;
 ignoring the drones with the chemical vats.·
·
·
Inspired by (1) reports today that buried in Blix's "cluster report" was the statement that the inspectors discovered Iraq has, and was concealing, pilot-less drones capable of flying into other countries to spray or disperse chemical or biological weapons and (2) an assertion today by Bill Tierney, a former U.N. weapons inspector, that more than three weeks ago he furnished Blix the precise coordinates of an underground uranium facility, that despite such precise information, the inspectors have not yet even gone to those coordinates, and, further, that despite their having failed to do so, Blix told the Security Council yesterday that the inspectors had been "unable to find" any "underground" facility.  --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.·

Direct link for this Update: 
·
polisat.com/du2003/du030331.htm#20030308-01·™©2003.
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..

··
March 03, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update #01··™©·2003··
·
Blixeau and ElBlabAday want Dubya to back-away.··
··
Blixeau* seems quite easy to please; 
ElBlabAday** always agrees,
and Gerhardt and Jacques
proclaim that Iraq's
a country "we love to appease."

Our sources say Gerhardt and Jacques
are coaching Saddam of Iraq
on feeding to Blix
enough tiny bits
to please him, click here*** for the facts..
·
·
Will Blix tout Saddam's piecemeal disclosures and piecemeal destruction of the rockets as "good progress" warranting indefinite extension of "inspectons"?  
·*·"Blixeau" is the name I assigned to Inspector Blix (Blix plus Clouseau = Blixeau.)
·**·"ElBlabAday" is the Pink-Pantherization of "ElBaradei."
·***·The proof is in the form of a "video tape" obtained by PoliSat.Com from highly classified sources.  To
         view this "video tape" of just one of the many "coaching" sessions, go here..
--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
·
Direct link for this Update: 
·
polisat.com/du2003/du030331.htm#20030303-01·™©2003.
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..

..
Jan. 27, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update #01·™©·2003··
Belated correction defining unspection.·
·
    Blixeau fin'lly stated corrections
    to rightly describe the complexion
    of work by his team:  
    It only could be
    correctly defined as unspections.

·
Inspired by listening to public portion of the report to the UN Security Council today by Hans Blix aka Inspector Blixeau conceding, in essence, that Iraq had failed to comply with the Council's resolution requiring Iraq to cure its noncompliance and furnish proof of doing so.  Afterward, Powell put it best by saying the question is not how much longer should the inspectors search in the dark but how much longer should we wait for Saddam Hussein to turn on the light.  --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
·
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2003/du030131.htm#2003012
7-01·™©2003.
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..
··
Jan. 18, 2003:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update
#01·™©·2003··
Blixeau blindly groping for guns that are smoking.·
·
    So little Saddam has been showing,
    to Baghdad Blixeau is now going
    proclaiming forthrightly
    he'll ask Saddam nicely
    to show us his guns that are smoking.

    Blixeau says the law he's invoking;
    however, the thought he's provoking
    performing his task
    inspires us to ask
    what substance Blixeau has been smoking.
·
Inspired by the January 18, 2003, report that Inspector Blixeau aka Hans Blix is en route to Baghdad to try to persuade the Iraqis to be "more cooperative" with the inspectors. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
·
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2003/du030131.htm#20030118-01·™©2003.
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..
··
Dec. 8, 2002:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update
#01·™©·2002··
Some pundits belatedly know that Blix is Inspector Blixeau.  ·
·
    It's lately some pundits we know
    said Blix is "Inspector Clouseau,"
    but we first perceived
    what they now believe: 
    He's really Inspector Blixeau.
·
Inspired by the sudden flurry of pundits (whom I won't name) equating Hans Blix with Inspector Clouseau not realizing that PoliSat.Com first exposed his true identity as
Inspector Blixeau on October 2, 2002.   --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021208-01·™©2002.
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..
··
Nov. 19, 2002:  PoliSat.Com's Political Satire/Commentary Daily Update
#01·™©·2002··
The firing of missiles & cannon...
does not make a breach proclaimed Annan.
·
·
Iraq's firing missiles and cannon
does not make a breach proclaimed Annan.*    ·
His statement surreal
again has revealed
he's studied the wrong set of canons.

His faith in the wrong set of canons
controls the agenda of Annan
assuring that he
continues to be
as "Gen'ral" a really loose cannon.



Hans Blix as Blixeau has the onus
for bombs of Saddam to be shown us,
but Kofi perceives
his function to be
Blixeau's Chief Inspector named Kofus.** ·

However, our experts on cannons
would alter not "Kofi" but "Annan"
because they perceive
his purpose to be
Blixeau's Chief Inspector named Annus***·



·
To learn if Blixeau will be smart
when he and inspectors embark
on searches for bombs
possessed by Saddam,
click here to see Shot in the Dark.

(For a larger version, click here.)



·
Previously, when reporters asked Kofi Annan to state what he would consider a "material breach," he always "diplomatically" evaded the question by saying, in effect, that whether any particular action should be deemed a "material breach" could only be made by "the Council."  Yet today when asked about Iraq's firing of anti-aircraft artillery at American/British planes patrolling the "no-fly" zones, Annan categorically stated that the Council would not consider such action to be a "material breach," thus giving Iraq the green light to intensify such activities with impunity in the eyes of Annan.  Thus, the bumbling but well-intentioned Inspector Blixeau must contend not only with the deceptiveness of Hussein's goons but also with the misguided Annan as his "Chief Inspector Annus."  
*Recently, a spokesman for Kofi Annan explained that proper pronunciation of his last name rhymes with "cannon" rather than "anon."  ** The Pink-Panterization of "Blix" is "Blixeau" as "Clouseau"; likewise, "Kofi" is "Kofus" as "Dreyfus."   ***I intend "Annus" to rhyme with "con-us" rather than "anus" to satisfy military experts who tell me (on conditions of anonymity, of course) that for Kofi Annan, the "Dreyfus" is "Annus."  --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021130.htm#20021119-01··™©2002.
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..
···
The mission of Blix-- is it smart... or merely a Shot in the Dark?·
·
To learn if Blixeau will be smart
when he and inspectors embark
on searches for bombs
possessed by Saddam,
click here to see Shot in the Dark.

(For a larger version, click here.)








·


--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
.
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021130.htm#20021118-01··™©2002.
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..
..
Saddam Hussein's letter says "No/Yes" to fetters.·
·
    Saddam sent a letter to say
    reluctantly he will obey
    the new resolution
    to force devolution
    of weapons with half-life decay.

    That letter, however, implied
    inspections might still be denied
    if sought in a way
    that fails to display
    respect for Saddam Hussein's pride.

    If Blix merely goes with the flow
    the way that Saddam has proposed,
    what title befits
    the mission of Blix?
    Return of Inspector Blixeau ! ·

    [
Click here to see/hear the Return of Inspector Blixeau.
·

Inspired by Saddam Hussein's sending the UN a letter purporting to unconditionally accept the Security Council resolution for inspections despite the nine page letter being full of implied, if not overt, equivocations. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
.
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021130.htm#20021113-01··™©2002.
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.··.
·Return of Blixeau to Iraq to find what Saddam's really got.·
·
    The Council today told Iraq*   [*
use the "ee-rock" pronounciation]
    Inspector Blixeau will embark.
    Will this be a mission
    to stop Saddam's fission
    or merely a Shot in the Dark

·

Today the UN Security Council purportedly unanimously "agreed" on terms for sending Inspector Blix back to Iraq.  Britain and the US said they interpreted the language as not prohibiting military action by member states upon a report of non-compliance by Iraq without further authorization from the Council while nearly all the other Council members expressed their view that the language would require further authorization by the Council before commencement of enforcement action. 
Click here to see the Return of Inspector Blixeau. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021130.htm#20021108-01··™©2002.
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..
··
Said Blix "To Iraq I won't go as feckless Inspector Blixeau."·

Said Blix to the Council,  "I'll go
inspecting if you will bestow
some bite to my barkin'
to force 'em to hearken
instructions on what they must show."  *      · 

Said Blix "If they force me to go
with bite to my bark not bestowed,
Saddam will perceive
my mission to be
Return of Inspector Blixeau."        
[
Click here to see Return of Inspector Blixeau.].
·
Inspired by an October 30, 2002, news report that Blix informed Bush that he's been telling UN Security Council members that sending him to Iraq to conduct weapons inspections would be ineffective absent the UN first making clear to Iraq that non-compliance would result in swift and serious consequences.  [
*Red quotation marks denote text paraphrasing the text of a quotation.] --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for this Update:  ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021031.htm#20021030-01··™©2002.


··

·
Saddam is agreeing to host... Return of Inspector Blixeau..·

Saddam's found a way he can show
he doesn't have weapons that glow
because he's obtaining
conditions arranging
Return of Inspector Blixeau.  [
Click here to see Return of Inspector Blixeau.]

Oct. 2,  2002 Political-Satire/Commentary -- Inspired by the statement on October 1, 2002, by Hans Blix (leader of the UN inspection team for Iraq) asserting that Iraq had agreed to unconditional inspections at any time, anywhere (except for Saddam's "palaces," for which inspections require advance notice, permission from Iraq and diplomats to accompany the inspectors).  --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com



















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