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Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Updates.©·2002..
Updates start
below in
reverse
chronological order. [CHANGE
FONT/TEXT SIZE]·
Cartoons/Animations/Parodies:
Saddam is agreeing to
host... Return of Inspector Blixeau.
Shot in
the Dark (Inspector Blixeau); Sambo-Mon
Song (Belafonte's insults; Powell's retorts).
··
··
Dec. 31, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update #01·©·2002··
To surfers today passing through here, from
PoliSat-Com Happy New Year!·
·
The eve of the New Year's arrived,
the second since innocents died.
Again we see fit
to emulate Brits,
whose courage made Britain survive.
·
--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021231-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 30, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update #01·©·2002··
The claim that our human endeavors make weather get
warmer than "ever."·
·
Reports say that "science" believes
we'll find the year Two Thousand Three
the "hottest" year "ever"
'cause Mankind's endeavors
are "warming" the Earth, they perceive.
In two ways this story misleads:
The first is the time-span perceived
as all-before "ever";
the next, Man's "endeavors,"
as "cause" of such heat in Aught-Three.
To properly use the word "ever"
the time-span of Earth before records
would have to be severed
to call "hottest ever"
a year that's just hottest on record.
This seems like a trivial point,
a sentence with words out of joint,
but "greenhouse" reporting
has long been resorting
to glossing such facts to make points.
Yet paleontology's findings
reveal pre-historical cycling
with decade-long ranges
for radical changes
in heat before humans' arriving.
Though rational analysis fails
to show that a "Greenhouse" travail
would not come to be
without S-U-V's,
the contrary activists wail.
Despite all the theories they tout,
the warming of Earth without doubt
is caused, au contraire,
by heat in the air
expelled from the activists' mouths.
·
Inspired by a December
29, 2002, report that "scientists" predict the year 2003 will be
the "warmest" year "ever" and that "warming over the past 50 years is mainly due to human activities like burning of fossil fuels."
For a rational explanation of why neither such inference from weather records
for the last 100 years is scientifically unwarranted, see "Global
Warming or Scientific Flatulence?" --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021230-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 29, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update #01·©·2002··
An earth-shaking marvel: Some wisdom from Carville.·
·
For once in my life I confess
in watching today's Meet the Press,
I witnessed a marvel:
A statement by Carville
with which I agree, I confess.
Expressing to all in the nation
for Mary his deep admiration,
he humbly avowed
he's thankful and proud
for service she rendered the nation.
Adapting the words of a sage
to fit in this digital age:
The time that is spoken
by clocks that are broken
is right at least once in a day.
It seems that his role as a Dad's
as good as his viewpoints are bad,
because he perceives
his daughters to need
their mother supported by Dad.
·
Today, on Meet the Press, wisdom emerged for the first time from James
Carville's lips when, at the end of the program after spouting his standard
partisan lines, he conveyed sincerity in expressing pride in the job Mary did in
working for Cheney and gratitude for her decision to place her relationship with
their children ahead of her career.
--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com.
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021229-01·©2002.
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················
Dec. 14--28, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update #01·©·2002··
At holiday time, read Archives of mine.·
·
Beginning today for a time,
my updates will not be on line
because a vacation
yours truly has taken,
so meanwhile, read Archives
of mine.
·
--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021214-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 13, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
"I'm leaving" said Matalin, "but James
I'll be battling."·
·
To Cheney, "I'm leaving," said Matalin--
"Fear not 'cause I still will be battling
your nemesis, James,
who's broken his chain
and soon will be barking and prattling."
·
Inspired by a report
that Mary Matalin is resigning as Cheney's advisor to spend more time with her
family. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021213-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 12, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
Got billions? Got millions? Got minions?·
·
The Mouth of the South is contending that terror
results from American policy errors
like failing to end
the poverty trend
in lands where the Arabs are turning to terror.
Since assets of Turner are valued in billions,
the Mouth of the South could reduce terror's minions
by sending his wealth
and toasts for good health
to poor old bin Laden, who struggles on millions.
·
Inspired by a Drudge
report of a speech by Ted Turner (at an event celebrating his pledge of 1
billion dollars to the United Nations), at which Turner said, inter alia: "In the Arab view, America doesn't do enough to help them and that's why they're so angry at
it, ... [because] ... [t]he battle against terrorism is a battle against poverty and injustice."
Surely Ahmed Omar Saeed Sheikh,
the barbaric murderer of Daniel Pearl, would not have committed such acts of
barbarism had he not experienced the "poverty" of attending the London
School of Economics. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021212-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 11, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
The Prince of PeeCee's been unable to climb from
the basement on cable.·
·
MSNBC
bought the fable
that Donahue coming to cable
would clobber The Factor,
but ratings got flatter
as we had predicted in April.*
The Prince of PeeCee
was unable
to climb from the basement on cable
'cause most who like news
and views will eschew
PeeCee when it's
featured on cable.
·
Inspired by a Drudge
report that Donahue's ratings on MSNBC have flat-lined, which is what
PoliSat.Com predicted back in April, 2002,
when MSNBC announced plans for Phil Donahue to host a politics/news program
opposite The Factor on FoxNews. *For
our April, 2002, prediction, go
here.
--Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021211-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 10, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
For whom are intended the Scuds bound for Yemen?.·
·
A ship North Korea had sent
disguised as a load of cement
contained in its hold
some Scuds it had sold
not labeled for whom they were meant.
Intelligence claims they're intended
for secret unloading in Yemen.
For whom's a conundrum.
We fear it's to someone
Saddam or al Qaeda's befriended..
·
Inspired by a news
report that Scuds were hidden beneath a shipment of concrete in the cargo
hold of an North Korean shipment under a false flag ostensibly headed for Yemen. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021210-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 9, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
Trent Lott proves his brain is lamer than lame. ·
·
When Lott said the country was wrong
to not have a President Strom,
he showed once again
the proof that his brain's
a fossil much older than Strom's.
·
Inspired by the obtuseness of Lott's statement to Thurmond on his 100th birthday
that if the country were to have voted for him for President in 1948 "we
wouldn't have had all these problems." --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021209-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 8, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
Some pundits belatedly know that Blix is Inspector
Blixeau. ·
·
It's lately some pundits we know
said Blix is "Inspector Clouseau,"
but we first perceived
what they now believe:
He's really Inspector
Blixeau.
·
Inspired by the sudden flurry of pundits (whom I won't name) equating Hans Blix
with Inspector Clouseau not realizing that PoliSat.Com first exposed his true
identity as Inspector
Blixeau on October
2, 2002. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021208-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 7, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
From Santa some toys for good little boys
while Rumsfeld sends "toys" to terrorist boys. ·
·
From Santa we hear that the boys
are asking for action-type toys
with Bush and Blair toppling
Usama bin Laden,
but what for al Qaedas are suitable toys?
Said Rumsfeld: "I plan to be Santa
for men who are serving Usama
with presents to cure
Usama's allure
with gifts they won't get from their mammas--
Colombia's 'girlies' on calendars nurtured
predictable rises in rebel deserters,
and so we'll bombard
al Qaedas with cards
enticing desertion with 'girlies' in burkas."*
*[Go
here to view Rumsfeld's for "Al Qaeda Trading Cards" Psy-Ops project]·
·
Inspired by news reports on Christmas toys such as Bush
dolls and action-figure
toys representing Bush, Blair and bin Laden and also by an earlier news
report that Colombia was "bombing" rebel camps with
"girlie" calendars to lure young men into deserting their rebellion to
enjoy the amenities of the war between the sexes. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021207-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 6, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
Descriptions of findings by Pew appear to deserve a
"pee-yew." ·
·
The way we by allies are viewed
ain't good say researchers at Pew,
but measures by Pew
appraising such views
appear to deserve a "pee-yew."
·
Inspired by a news
report of the results of a survey in a number of countries by the Pew
Research Center for the People and the Press. The press release suggested
the US has become very unpopular among its "allies," yet the findings
showed the following percentages of people in the following countries have a
"favorable" view of the U.S. in 1999 compared to now in 2002
(then/now): Germany: 78/61 (-17); Great Britain 83/75 (-8); Italy
76/70 (-6); France 62/63 (+1) Russia 37/61 (+24); Turkey 52/30 (-22); Pakistan
23/10 (-13); Indonesia 75/61 (-14); Kenya 94/80 (-14). Of course the
results for Turkey and Pakistan are disturbing, but what about not only the
still-high approval rating in the others but also the dramatic improvement among
Russians? Furthermore, since we are currently the bearer of bad news
(i.e., Iraq is dangerous), one would expect that people not desiring to face the
reality of bad news would thus not be pleased with us for confronting them with
reality; thus, the results are surprisingly favorable when viewed in that
light. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021206-01·©2002.
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··
Dec. 5, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
To counter an Ex-POTUS "whine-ary",
·
go "Counter"
then "Clinton" then "Library." ·
·
·
Bill Clinton has named his library
a "center" instead of library.
Of course we know why
in the blink of an eye:
'cause "library" rhymes with "Liebrary."
But why did he choose the word "center"?
It's not 'cause the sound rhymes with "enter."
The idea was his,
so we know that it "is"
subconscious Clinphonics© for "sinner" !
But OSHA made safety-rules clear
to which tourists have to adhere:
For women they're here;
For children, they're here;
For Bill's protιgιs they are here.
Since Clinton chose "Center" not "Library,"
for housing his legacy "whine-ary."
To counter his shrine
preserving his whines,
go "Counter"
then "Clinton" then "Library."*
-- Librarian@ClintonLiebrary.Com.
Clinphonics© is a term I coined and explained in the
Clinton
Liebrary Book in the chapter on
Translating Clintonese. See also "Hookered on
Clinphonics." .
·
·*
This reprise and update was inspired by today's announcement of the
establishment of a bricks & mortar "Counter
Clinton Library" in Little Rock scheduled to open in 2003. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021205-01·©2002.
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..
..
·
Updates for Dec. 2 through 4, 2002 are temporarily
unavailable.·
··
Dec. 1, 2002: PoliSat.Com's
Political Satire/Commentary
Daily Update
#01·©·2002··
Can "girlie" displays change terrorists'
ways?·
·
Colombia's government shows us the way
by bombing their rebels with "girlie" displays
of "Calendar Girls"
with clothing unfurled
for luring the rebels to civilized ways.
·
Said Rumsfeld, "Colombia's shown us the way
for luring al Qaeda to Westernized ways
with trading-card versions
of seventy virgins
for those who surrender to Westernized ways."
·
Inspired by a news
report that Colombia began
"bombing" rebel camps with "girlie" calendars desired to
lure young rebels into deserting to return to the advantages of civilization. --Jim Wrenn, Editor@PoliSat.Com..
Direct link for
this Update: ·http://polisat.com/du2002/du021231.htm#20021201-01·©2002.
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....
For the Daily Update immediately preceding
the one above, click
here.
For Daily Update Archives, click
here.
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