|
·support our
troops, support Bush, support Cheney, support victory in Iraq, support victory in Afghanistan,
Clinton Liebrary, http://PoliSat.Com
, PoliSatDOTcom, Salute America's Heroes, Fallen Heroes Fund, oppose Gore's Global Warming theory, support milblogs, Michael Yon, Pat Dollard, BlackFive, MilBlogs, MilBlogging, Michael Yon, Mudville Gazette, HotAir.Com, JawaReport, PajamasMedia , VictoryCaucus , VetsForFreedom ,
FreedomsWatch , DayByDayCartoon , WrennCom.Com , Video , Political Satire, Politics, News, oppose MoveOn.Org, oppose Code Pink, oppose DailyKos, oppose ANSWER, support PoliSat.Com, support WrennCom.Com, ·
|
|
Political
Satire
Daily Update ©
2001 by Jim Wrenn.
These are Political Satire Daily Updates for
May, 2001 in reverse
chronological order. For other time periods, see Archives of Daily Updates.
May 31, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01 by Jim
Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
WHO's blowing smoke about second-hand
smoke? (PoliSat Limerick)
The claim by the W-H-O
of danger in second-hand smoke
was clearly disproved
by studies by whom?
By studies by W-H-O !
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010521-01. Despite the May 31, 2001, claim by WHO (the
UN's World Health Organization) claiming second-health smoke constitutes an
environmental health hazard, the largest study ever conducted comparing the
health of non-smokers raised in households with smokers with that of non-smokers
raised in smoke-free households showed that the non-smokers raised in households
with smokers were on the average sick less often than non-smokers raised in
smoke-free households. Although those findings (in a study funded by WHO)
supported findings that nicotine in trace amounts actually boosts the immune
system, the WHO followed the politically correct but scientifically indefensible
approach of ignoring such results in order to further demonize smokers as
endangering the health of others.
May 30, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
The Mighty Casey's Free to Tee ...
Infringing Choice for You and Me.
(PoliSat Parody of The
Mighty Casey at the Bat)
The outlook seemed quite friendly to the PGA that day
...
Their lawyers told the Justices, "The rules are what we
say,"
but Casey said "They must be forced to play the game my
way,
'cause golf's a game with handicaps for those who poorly
play."
Though Thomas and Scalia ruled, "It's not our place to
say,"
t'was Stevens joined by Kennedy plus Breyer and Sandra-Day
plus Ginsburg, Souter and the Chief who ruled another way,
imposing legal handicaps on how the game is played.
When those inclined to praise the Court and raise the cheer,
"Olé"
that gov'ment circumscribed the rules on how the game is
played,
find rights that they prefer are lost, they'll learn to their
dismay,
that freedom's choice is what was really handicapped today.
© 2001 PoliSat
Rhyme 20010530-01. Inspired by Washington
Times Report on May 30, 2001, about the seven-to-two US. Supreme Court
decision that the Americans With Disabilities Act empowered the federal
government to rewrite the rules of the PGA to allow Casey Martin to travel from
tee to tee in a golf cart despite PGA rules prohibiting such mode of travel
between tees at PGA tournaments. With Justices Thomas and Scalia
dissenting, seven Justices (Stevens, Renquist, O´Connor, Kennedy, Souter, Ginsburg and
Breyer) ruled the ADA empowered the feds to require the PGA to allow Martin to
participate in a manner contrary to the PGA rules.
May 29, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
When Doolittle led his own raid, the danger
was worse than the grave. (PoliSat
Limerick)
I learned from the movie, Pearl
Harbor,
that Doolittle risked a great horror
that he would be played
by Baldwin, the knave,
who mocks men with Doolittle's ardor.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010529-01. To me, having Alec Baldwin, who mocks today's
visionary advocates of military preparedness, portray Jimmy
Doolittle, a courageous, military-defense visionary, was as insulting to
Doolittle's memory as would be having Madonna portray Mother Theresa.
May 28, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
Memorial Day, 2001.
(Reprise of May, 2000, Memorial Day Limerick)
Today is
Memorial Day,
and so we should solemnly pay
our tribute to those
now buried in rows
for us to have freedom today.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010528-01.
May 27, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
Memorial Day Weekend (Sunday)
(Non-satirical PoliSat Limerick)
This weekend the movie,
Pearl Harbor,
reminds us of those who faced horror,
and many who died
so we could arrive
today in their better tomorrows.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010527-01.
May 26, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
Pantheopians**
attack EssYooVeeans.
(PoliSat Limerick)
Today I believe there's a need
for me to provide a reprise
of limericks
I made
in 2000 in May
to warn those who drive S-U-V's:
To please all the pantheopians
the Ford Motor Comp'ny sang paeans
to say it ain't right
that SUV's height
hurts cars that are made for plebians.
Of course
those who buy S-U-V's
are looking for safety, you see,
so they won't be crushed
by much bigger trucks
or those with those big 18 wheels.
But if SUV's are made weaker
so risks to their riders are bleaker,
then sales will go up
for customized trucks
for those who still value their freedom.
Then
pantheopians** will say
we now must find some other way,
so they will opine
it should be a crime
to use trucks in non-business ways.
**Pan'-thee-oh-pee'-uns
(alternate pronunciation: is pan'-thee-oh'-pee-uns--
I use whichever best fits the rhyme): This is a term I coined to describe
the activist philosophy of those exhibiting a worship of nature (pantheism) with
the zealotry of utopians. For more about Pantheopians, go
here. Jim Wrenn,
Political Satire Editor at PoliSat.Com.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010526-01. Inspired by the increasing shrillness of the
political war against SUV's. The May 12, 2000 version was inspired by a
May 12, 2000, FoxNews story about Ford Motor Company singing mea
culpa for designing its SUV's with
a high center of gravity.
May 25, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
Confucius say "Pictures of Tiananmen ...
worth more than some words of a Chinaman."
(PoliSat Limerick)
Confucius say "Picture is worth
so much
more than one-thousand words."
So under that principle
"Picture's invincible
against one who merely speaks words."
Zimen, who called Dubya "unprincipled,"
forgot about "Picture's invincible,"
'cause pictures of Chinamen
slaughtered in Tiananmen
invincibly show who's "unprincipled."
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010525-01. Inspired by a May
24, 2001 CNN report that Jiang Zemin described George Bush as
"logically unsound, confused and unprincipled, unwise to the extreme."
May 24, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
Jumpin' Jehosifat-- Where is Jeffords
jumpin' at? (PoliSat Limerick)
We've all heard of "Jumpin' Jehosifat"
but where is that man Jeffords jumpin' at?
He jumped from Vermont
to the hotbed of wonks,
which moots whether Thurmond knows where-he's-at.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010524-01. Inspired by May
24, 2001 Washington Times report that Vt. Sen. Jim Jeffords
"jumped" from Republican to Independent.
May 23, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The blue dress is hist'ry that solved a great
myst'ry. (PoliSat Limerick)
Lewinsky's attorney proclaimed
she wants her blue dress that was stained.
'Though Feds call it hist'ry
that solved a great myst'ry,
perhaps they'd consider a trade.
So who should arrange such a trade?
The man who had authored the stain !
So Bill should turn over
his clothes worn in Poland
with stains
from a chick's DNA.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010523-01. Inspired by a May
22, 2001, New York Daily News report that on May 21, 2001, Monica Lewinsky's
lawyer told Bloomberg News Service that Monica wants her blue dress returned to
her. See also PoliSat's
May 19, 2001 Daily Update-01 about Clinton's clothing in Poland being
stained by a chick's DNA.
May 22, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
Oh my, what a sad thing it is ... when parents
keep acting like kids. (PoliSat Limerick)
A judge has now ruled against Rudy
"Protect Gracie Mansion from Judith
and don't ask for gags
on you and your hag--
You both should stop acting so foolish."
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010522-01. Inspired by a May
22, 2001, report in the Washington Times about the battle between Rudy
Giuliani and Donna Hanover in the courts and in the media. As in many
divorce cases involving children, each parent makes himself/herself look bad in
a misguided effort to make himself/herself look better relative to the other by
trying to make the other parent look worse. Who are the real victims?
The kids. How can public officials urge teens and young adults that
bearing children obligates them to put their childrens' interests ahead of their
own when public officials are doing the opposite?
May 21, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
Don't tax me, don't tax thee, tax folks eating
chili beans ! (PoliSat Limerick)
The stop-greenhouse-gas folks are fractalants ;**
.
however they'll need lots of valiance
.
if laws they propose
let government's nose
inspect us to tax us for flatulence.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010521-01. Inspired by 05-21-01
report in New Zealand Herald describing protests by farmers as having
persuaded the government to "rule out" a per-cow/per-sheep
"flatulence tax" (as Dave Barry would say, "I am not making this
up!") that had apparently been considered by bureaucrats as a way to reduce
"greenhouse" gas emissions.
.**
I derived "fractalants" from fractal to identify people who's thinking
and/or philosophy and/or ideology is fractal, such as eco-fanatics or
pantheopians***,
the latter being a term I coined to describe those exhibiting pantheistic
beliefs with the fanaticism of utopians. If you don't have a dictionary
handy, you can look-up "fractal" at Dictionary.Com.
May 20, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © PoliSat.Com.
There could be delight if Annan is right.
(PoliSat Limerick)
A statement from Kofi Annan
proclaims global warming anon.
If so, there's a prize ...
the ocean will rise
and fill the UN before long.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010520-01. Inspired by UPI report that yesterday, in
a commencement address at the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy at Tufts
University outside Boston, UN Secretary General Kofi Annan proclaimed that the
global-warming theory "is not some distant, worst-case scenario, it is
tomorrow's forecast." As was the case in the middle ages, when
religious and/or political agendas determined what were proper conclusions from
science, enshrined them as articles of faith, and then branded any contradictory
findings as heresy, today's political hierarchies, pantheopian**
activists, the entertainment media, and (even worse) the dominant news media
have now enshrined the global-warming theory as an article of faith and branded
scientific findings to the contrary as heresy. See also PoliSat's
May 9, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01 about blind-faith reliance on
junk-eco-science."
May 19, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
In Poland it's fit to throw eggs at a twit.
The best type of justice (PoliSat Limerick)
In Poland, Slick Willie was hit
when someone threw eggs at the twit.
It's fitting, not strange,
his clothing was stained
with DNA made by a chick.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010519-01. Inspired by a UPI news report on May 18, 2001,
that an anti-globalization protester struck Clinton with an egg during his visit
to Poland.
May 18, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The wisdom of Dan Rather-Blather displayed on
O'Reilly's "The Factor." (PoliSat Limerick)
We heard Rather-Blather proclaim
on Fox that Juanita's rape-claim
was not an event
for news to present
'cause "sex is a private [domain]."
So, claims that a person was thanking
officials with bribes through our banking
should not make the news ...
'cause that would abuse
his privacy rights in his banking.
We all need to broaden our vision
by studying Rather's great wisdom.
For brilliant examples
you simply must sample
our Dan Rather Archives
Division.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010518-01. Inspired by Dan Rather telling O'Reilly (on
Fox News on May 15, 2001) that the reason he thought Juanita Broadderick's
allegation that Clinton raped her
did not warrant extensive news coverage
is that "sex is a private matter."
May 17, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
Could Dubya's intentions
trump Al Gore's inventions?
(PoliSat Limerick)
We know pantheopians**
hate
the plans Bush proposes today
so we can derive
a larger supply
of power the cap'talist way.
They say Dubya's plan is defective
and Gore's would be much more effective.
You'll be in the know
by reading below
to learn how Gore's plan is corrective:
Editor's
introductory note: Under the
poetic tutelage of Jesse Jackson, Al Gore's description of his plan (below)
combines his knowledge of science and politics to devise innovative,
environmentally friendly ways to improve transportation while at the same time
reducing hazardous dumps, dependence on foreign oil, fossil-fuel depletion,
dependence on nuclear power, and, of course, poverty.
What's
Behind the Green Gore? (a sequel to Earth
in the Balance)
I'm Gore,
who wrote Earth in the Balance ...
to prove I am up to the challenge
on how to conserve
to save Mother
Earth ...
with power left over to balance.
Without even slight
condescension,
I must say I make good inventions
And how do I do it?
There ain't nothin' to it,
'cause nothin' escapes my attention !
Before I describe my invention
I'll honor political wisdom
to credit my tenants
who gave me the business
that gave me this great inspiration.
When bad news first came to the fore
disputing that I'm a Green Gore,
I said it was false
to say it's my fault
or that I don't care for the poor.
My tenants had called me slum-Goring
and claimed I invented slum-lording
and claimed I don't care
and don't do repair
'cause rent-money I had been hording.
I swear that I just didn't know
that each time my tenants would "go,"
They suffered in slush
'cause after each flush,
the toilet would soon overflow.
And then as though that ain't enough,
the cleanup was always so tough,
'Cause when they got up
to clean up the muck,
they found that the sink had backed up.
When E-P-A checked-out the lumps,
and OSHA examined their rumps,
The experts opined
that I should be fined
for causing such hazardous dumps.
On learning my tenants' conditions
did not meet the plumbing conventions
since each time they flush,
they're wading in slush,
I thought of a brand-new invention.
I always stay right up to date
on ev'rything science can make
So I knew of course
a new fuel source:
We now can refine human waste !
And what gives my Green
heart a thrill?
To get it we don't have to drill
My tenants can "go,"
then sell overflow,
and soon their accounts will be filled.
The profit we'll take from the till
to make a new automobile
Then we will hype
a new prototype
and call it the AlGoreMobile.
This auto will please the whole nation,
'cause no one will need service stations
And if you ask me
just how this can be,
I'll give you a quick explanation: .
The obsolete gasoline tank
will yield to a nice septic tank
And old drivers' seats
become toilet seats
so drivers can fill their own tanks.
Of course there's a need for improvement,
and clearly it's in our behoovement
That models display
their mileage CAFE
at fifty-six miles to the movement !
For drivers a danger is plain:
To get extra mileage they'll strain
To them we'll repeat,
just be sure to eat
the foods with high fibre and grain.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010517-01. Inspiration:
Al Gore's environmental sensitivity in the manner in which he solved
toilet-backup problems by his tenants on his Tennessee estate described in a Fox
News report (last year on June 6, 2000), which followed soon after a BBC
report (last year on May 20, 2000) about scientists having discovered how to
convert human waste into fossil fuel. To study the original versions (and
other rhymes), go to our page of limericks and
rhymes about Gore. See also our Political Satire Daily Update archives
at 20000530-01
and 20000604-01
and 20000612-01.
May 16, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
So what's the indicia of using
"militia"? (PoliSat Limerick)
"A well-regulated militia,"
say gun-foes, "is clearly indicia
the Second Amendment
is just an intendment
that States could establish militias."
Were that to have been the intent
't'would be in the one numbered Ten,
without need to write
that a citizen's right
to "bear arms shall not be infringed."
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010516-01. Resumption of clamor for more gun laws and
the July
9 through 20, 2001, meeting scheduled at the United Nations to study proposals
for the UN to ultimately ban all "small arms" from the planet
remind me how easily those opposing Second Amendment self-protection rights dupe
the uninformed into believing the Second Amendment's purpose was to confer upon
governments the power to regulate militias rather than to protect citizens'
self-protection rights from governmental
infringement.
May 15, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The Natural helps pantheist friends
attack All the President's Men. (PoliSat Limerick)
How silly that Redford, The
Natural,
pretended to be very baffled
that Norton thought he
would join her to see
a Condor returned to what's natural.
But Redford of course was too canny
to not understand she was planning
to counter the libel
that Bush would unbridle
big business to plunder the planet.
But pantheist groups he defends
make claims that give science the bends.
One only
need gander
at their
propaganda :
Hypocrisy's crème de la
crème !
Supporting the pantheists' dreams,
he labels opponents as mean
to further such groups'
recruitment of dupes
by using techniques in The
Sting.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010515-01. Inspired by Robert Redford's rude,
self-righteous and sanctimonious rejection of Interior Secretary Norton's
invitation for Redford to attend the release of rare condor into nature.
See the May
14, 2001, report in The Times.
May 14, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The specials with Perry made Christmases
merry.
(PoliSat Limerick as non-satirical tribute to Perry Como)
We surely will miss Perry Como.
His singing inspired Chasing Rainbows,
It's surely improbable--
perhaps It's Impossible --
to find better singers than Como.
© 2001 Poliat
Limerick 20010514-01. Inspired by sadness at the loss of Perry Como,
who died yesterday.
May 13, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
A Mothers Day tribute to virtue displayed by
the Mothers who nurture.
(Revision and reprise of a PoliSat Limerick from 05-07-00)
I'm tired of the whining and frets
by Yuppies with children as pets.
The proper child care
is Mom who is there--
not someone who's paid to hear frets.
We know many women fall prey
to outlandish notions that they
must have a career
to satisfy peers
and leave kids with strangers all day
Why do career gals suppose
that others should pay through the nose,
so they can pay less
for care they think best,
so they can keep up with the Jones?
My own boys were quite lucky guys
as apples of their Mama's eyes.
She had a career
but quit without fear
so they would be first in our lives.
She could have preferred a career
and sent them to child-care to rear,
but she knew it best
for us to have less
for them to have more of her near.
Should one-income couples pay more
in taxes for child-care galore,
so two-income fam'lies
can sample life's candies
and pay less for child-caring chores?
Of course the right answer is "No."
So who does that leave-- Do you know?
Those two-income fam'lies
and grandads and grannies--
and college-kid's parents-- but whoa !
All in those groups will say "No,
we just can't afford to pay mo' !"
And so who is left
to become more bereft
for yuppies to keep up their show?
Just who should be brought to their knees
to pay for such big-spending sprees?
They shouldn't tax me
and shouldn't tax thee--
instead tax the guy who's behind the big tree.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010513-01.
May 12, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
A insight that's dawning like sunshine--
for laws to go easy on "Love Crimes."
(PoliSat Limerick)
For laws against hate-crimes they're bellowing
for reds, whites and yellows and ebonies.
Instead we should say
all violence shows hate ...
then name other types "Friendly Felonies."
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010512-01. Inspired by the current passion to enact laws
against "hate crimes" in contrast to those committed to show affection
for the victms.
May 11, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
Confucius say hackers face counter-attackers.
(PoliSat Limerick)
Confucius say hackers have gumption
to threaten our internet functions,
'til Red Chinese backers
of Red Chinese hackers
face Mutual ... Assured ... Destruction.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010511-01. Inspired by May 10, 2001 UPI report that the Red
Chinese government apparently called-off it's hack-attacks against US internet
sites after the Red Chinese government's sites experienced retaliation by US
hackers.
May 10, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The I-R-S agents are best ...
at checking the
gross and the net. (PoliSat Limerick)
The Treasury Department has checked
computers that run I-R-S.
This thorough review
allows us to view
the things those computers do best.
The workers who run I-R-S
believe that their job to inspect
the gross and the net
means surfing the Net
to closely Inspect
Raunchy
Sex.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010510-01. Inspired by the May
10, 2001, Washington Times report that the Treasury Department Inspector
General's found that surfing the internet for porn comprises a significant
portion of IRS employees' on-the-job use of IRS computers.
May 9, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The blind-faith reliance on
junk-eco-science. (PoliSat
Limerick)
Beliefs truly founded on science
are subject to special requirements
which unlike religion
encourage revision,
reversal, review and refinement.
My elders and those who are my
age
heard experts predict a new ice-age.
Now forty years later,
we're viewed as Darth Vaders
for doubting predictions of heat-waves.
The difference between now and then
is founded on whom we depend.
Back then
voices heard
were the scientist-nerds,
but now it's the activists' din.
So what caused this change to occur?
Back then most reporters conferred
with scientist-nerds
speaking scientist-words,
but now they seek activist-nerds.
And what has this change brought about?
Acceptance on faith without doubt
by naive reporters
whose failures as sorters
keep chaff as the wheat is thrown out.
From where come the theories for warning
that humans will cause global warming?
Proponents have coddled
computerized models
like those for predictions of storming.
But facts that should counter those fears
do not seem to enter their ears--
like twice-daily notes
that match highs but not lows
with sunspots for two-hundred years.
They likewise ignore in their models
that Earth in its orbit has waddles,
which cycle like gears
for thousands of years,
which makes Earth get colder or hotter.
In calling a few recent years
the hottest in 600 years,
they simply will not
ask why it was hot
so long before autos appeared.
Reporters who think proof it's warmer
are pictures
of Kilimanjaro
with snowcaps receding
don't know they're believing
some pictures
in misleading order.
So when will reporters decide
to stop telling only one side?
By now it is plain,
they never will change
until the next ice-age arrives.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010509-01. Inspired by Rich
Noyes' May 7, 2001, report of his news-media study for Media Research
documenting most reporters' blind faith in the global-warming theory depicted as
science by activist groups with eco-ideological goals with most reporters
apparently share.
May 8, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01 by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
To be avant-garde pedagogic requires
some collectivist logic. (PoliSat Limerick)
To be avant-garde pedagogic,
a school banished Mothers Day topics,
so kids without mothers
would not have to suffer
while others make Mothers Day projects.
Such motherless-child pedagogy
is simply collectivist logic
to limit the blessed
so none of the rest
can learn life is not fairly plotted.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010508-01. Inspired by a May 08, 2001, report that a
school banned Mothers Day celebrations to avoid offending students who live in
"non-traditional" families or who lost mothers due to death or
divorce. One would think a good school would know the value of teaching
how to cope with, rather than promoting denial of, unpleasant realities and
would also teach the good citizenship of not resenting another person being more
fortunate than oneself.
May 7, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
How soon will they make CNN the Clinton
News Network again? (PoliSat Limerick)
CNN has continued to lose
as viewers convert to Fox News.
They won't get 'em back,
so they must attract
the viewers not looking for news.
So now CNN's looking into
a plan to give Clinton the Spin Room:
Trade Carlson and Press
for livelier guests
and name his new program "The Sin Room."
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010507-01. Inspired by rumors that CNN wants to offer
Clinton $15 million a year to host a new program on CNN.
May 6, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01 by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
A micro-chip-implant designed to link separate bodies and minds.
(PoliSat Limerick about new plans for micro-chip implants--See note below. )
A husband-wife scientist-team
made something for ev'ry wife's dream.
To make this advance
each spouse must implant
a micro-transmitting machine.
The moment a thought is beginning
the thinker's transmitter is sending
a digital code
that promptly will go
at once to the other's nerve endings.
If tests go according to plan,
when brains of the wife give commands
for lifting her hand,
the hand of the man
will promptly obey the command.
By most wives, this first will be used
so husbands do chores the wives choose,
But soon they'll aim higher
with secret desires
for husbands to make the earth move.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010506-01. Note:
Inspired
by a May
6, 2001, report in the Sunday Times that a husband-wife research team is on
the verge of developing a system for micro-chip implants in humans to enable one
person to control the muscle movements of another.
May 5, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01 by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
In writing the lines, could you
leave-out the whines?
(PoliSat Limerick)
The writers for TeeVee and movies
and bosses they call their "il duces"
have reached an agreement
for mutual appeasement
so actors can speak in the movies.
And writers for all entertainers
have fin'lly agreed on retainers.
So now they'll continue
preparing the menu
of words for our best entertainers.
In good things some bad can be seen,
so what could be wrong with this scene?
The writing of lines
will give us more whines
from Baldwin and Streisand and Sheen.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010505-01.
May 4, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01 by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The champion contrivers are not on
"Survivors". (PoliSat Limerick)
Although I have not
watched "Survivors,"
I know it's about some contrivers,
who learn to betray
a companion a day--
like Washington socialite/climbers.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010504-01. Perhaps the popularity of the television
program, "Survivors," is that the goals and methods among the
participants bear such striking resemblances to those long ago perfected in
D.C., where, it's been said by someone I can't recall, a "good friend
is one who stabs you in the chest."
May 3, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
They seek product-safety perfection but
mock anti-missile protection.
From business the lib'rals insist
on steps to prevent ev'ry risk.
Those safety-first preachers
want trigger-lock features,
but rogue-missile launches they'll risk.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010503-01. Inspired by the absurd paradox that the
activists most stridently demanding that business provide nearly perfect
protection from every conceivable misuse of a product mock Bush's proposal for
developing and deploying a defense to missiles launched against us on purpose by
rogue nations or accidentally by other nations.
May 2, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
Confucius did say: "Beware the beret."
(PoliSat Limerick)
We now know Confucius did say:
"Berets that in China were made
can lead to disservice
if worn during service
'cause that is how Clinton was made."
© 2001 PoliSat Limerick
20010502-01. Inspired by a report
in the Washington Times on May 2, 2001 about the Pentagon's decision to not
have soldiers wear black berets made in China (which were ordered from China
during Clinton's administration).
May 1, 2001 Political Satire Daily Update-01
by Jim Wrenn © 2001 PoliSat.Com.
The fair-minded Tim re-emerges to show us his
fair-minded urges. (PoliSat Limerick)
Tim Russert made brilliant retorts
that folks making careless reports
that Kerry did wrong
while in combat in 'Nam
want self-validation, of course.
© 2001 PoliSat
Limerick 20010501-01. Inspired by the re-emergence of the fair-minded
Tim Russert in presenting on Imus in the Morning
his cogent analysis of the motivations behind the apparent eagerness of some to
so readily give credence to the allegation that Bob Kerry explicitly ordered the
shooting of unarmed old men, women and children while on a combat mission in
Viet Nam. Kerry says that upon entering a hostile village at night after
ordering his patrol to return fire directed at them as they approached the
village, he found the dead bodies of old men, women and children. There's
yet another possibility apparently not perceived even by Russert in his obvious
attempt to view the story in a fair-minded way:
Has anybody considered whether those who had directed fire at Kerry's patrol had
themselves killed the old men, women and children to create the appearance of a
massacre by the U.S. soldiers? Did anyone conduct (or was it then even
feasible to conduct) an examination of those bodies to determine the types of
weapons with which they were shot? Is this not a logical question to ask
in light of such tactics having been known to have been previously used by the
North Vietnamese and/or the Viet Cong?
This page
contains Daily Updates for May, 2001.
Updates for other time-periods are in our Archives of Daily Updates.
Please be
patient with our renovation in progress
while we also
keep the site fully functional..
Editor's Note: If
following a link to a particular Daily Update brings you here, that particular
Daily Update has probably been moved to our archives, in which case you can find
it in one of the archives listed below.
Archives
for Daily Updates: Click
Here..
