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PoliSat Rhymes about...
SUV's (Sport Utility Vehicles).
(To go to our main page for SUV's, click here.)  (Go to Index to PoliSat Rhymes)

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Gasoline Prices:  Gouging for Votes  ( limerick 20000621-01)
    Since gasoline prices have risen, 
    Al Gore takes a puzzling position.
    His book said we need  
    high prices indeed  
    to save us from cars run by pistons.
    Yet now he has started espousing 
    that high prices constitute gouging,
    But it ain't the money, 
    it's who gets it, honey, 
    just "profits" not taxes are "gouging." 
© 2000

Thomas Crapper's invention paves way for a 
new-century, renewable-energy source. (limerick 20000531-01)
A limerick inspired by a 05-29-00 BBC report about scientists' discovery of a way to convert human waste into fossil fuel:
    Thank goodness for high-tech improvements 
    to counter the Mother-Earth Movement
    So we can eschew 
    those S-U-V blues 
    and end pantheistic denouement.
    A quite-recent high-tech advance 
    will counter the Earth-Day demands ...
    That say it's our fate 
    to cut driving rates 
    by walking on feet and on hands.
    A fuel from human-waste boiling 
    will supersede gassing and oiling.
    A thing that might foil-it 
    or otherwise spoil-it:  
    the driver's seat must be a toilet.
    Of course this creates a behoovement 
    that car-comp'nies strive for improvement,
    But there is good news 
    'cause when this is used, 
    you get fifty-miles to the movement. 
© 2000 (du20000530-01)

Pantheopians attack EssYuVeeans (limerick 20000512-01)
    To please all the pantheopians*  
    the Ford Motor Comp'ny sang paeans
    to say it ain't right 
    that SUV's height 
    hurts cars that are made for plebians.
    Of course those who buy SUV's 
    are looking for safety, you see,
    so they won't be crushed 
    by much bigger trucks 
    or those with those big 18 wheels.
    But if SUV's are made weaker 
    so risks to their riders are bleaker,
    then sales will go up 
    for for customized trucks 
    for those who still value their freedom.
    Then pantheopians will say 
    we now must find some other way,
    so they will opine 
    it should be a crime 
    to use trucks in non-business ways  
© 2000  (See 05-12-00 FoxNews story about Ford's mea culpa)
*Pan-thee-oh-pee'-uns:  This is a term I coined to describe the activist philosophy of those exhibiting a worship of nature (pantheism) with the zealotry of utopians.  Jim Wrenn, Political Satire Editor at PoliSat.Com.