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PoliSat
Rhymes about...
Hillary Rodham (Clinton?).
To go to our main page for Hillary, click here.
Songs "by" or about Hillary, click
here.
PoliSat Rhymes
about Hillary, click here. (For PoliSat
Rhymes, about other
people click
here.)
Editor's Note:
This page doesn't contain all of PoliSat.Com's material about Hillary. To
find the rest, use the Search-PoliSat.Com
function.
Songs
"by" or about Hillary:..
Take Me Into the Poll Game (1999 World Series). Take
Me Into the Poll Game (2000 Subway Series).
PoliSat
Rhymes
about Hillary. (use right-side cursor to browse rhymes
starting below in reverse chronological order.)
.
Take Me into the Poll Game
(Y2K version) (tune of Take Me Out to the Ball Game)(20001018-01)
I missed Ninety-Nine's Series, I
stayed out of the crowd
It was a sweep by the Yanks, you know
Now I'm sad that I chose not to go
'Twas a sweep, sweep, sweep by the home team
Put Atlanta to shame
For it's one, two, three 't'was a sweep in the
Series Games
Sub-way series for this year, Yankees
versus the Mets
I've always been a big Yankee fan,
Ricky's always said he's a Mets fan
So its hoot, hoot, hoot at the Mets fans
If we don't win it's a shame
For it's one, two, three strikes he's out in the
sub--way game.
I have always loved Yank-eees, not to mention the Mets
Baseball is one of my fav'rite games
Cause you can steal without feeling ashamed
So it's steal, steal, steal for my own team
If I get caught it's a shame
For it's one, two, three files I've hid in the old
campaign
I'm ahead in the Poll Game, I'm in
touch with the crowd
Bought me a house with some funds from hacks
They don't care if I never pay back
So it's root, root, root against Riiick-eee
If I don't win it's a shame
For it's one, two,
three strikes he's out in the old poll game
Rick-ee walked into my space, told me that I should sign
That is no way to treat such such a nice girl
He is just the most rude in the world
So I whimper like a hurt woman
Claim that he should fee shame
Then I'm in his face and he's out of the old Poll
Game.
I just love the Big Apple, I'm the
toast of the town
Moynihan gave me luke-warm support
He'll soon learn that I'm not a good sport
So it's hoot, hoot, hoot at ole Pat-rick
He's the one that I'll blame
For it's one, two, three times he messed-up my
whole campaign
Make me cookies from web sites criticizing my views
Give them to hackers in my campaign
Find the names of whoever complains
So it's hack, hack, hack for my campaign
Send a virus or two
For it's one, two, three hacks, they're out, then
we'll drink champagne
Get those files from the White House,
Get them for my campaign
Ken Starr is gone so we're safe from jail
All those files will be good for black-mail
So it's threat, threat, threat for coercion
Send a picture or two,
For it's one, two, three pics, you're out of the
whole campaign
Don't give money to Riiick-eee, Give those millions to me
I'm a celeb and I need the bread
I don't dare to let Rick get ahead
So its give, give, give to my campaign
If I lose I'll be rich
Only one, two, three million bucks are just not
enough
I'm well liked as a victim, please feel
sorry for me
I'm just campaigning as therapy
Cattle futures won't do it for me
So just give, give, give me your money
Then just please vote me in
then I'll have your money and I will be free from
him © 1999-2000.
To be continued.....
© 2000 --News
reports indicate that in the 2000 Subway Series, Hillary's for the Yankees
and Rick's for the Mets. ..
Soft-headed fools want
soft-money rules. (limerick 20000926-01)
Now Ricky and Hill'ry agree
to not have a soft-spending spree
"It's great" says McCain
and Feingold, "The same,"
and ask all the PAC's to accede.
How dumb in the land of the free
to only have candidates speak
as if those in PAC's
should not speak the facts
or go on their own spending spree.
© 2000
Much ado about nothing or
nothing about much ado? (limerick 20000922-01)
The White-House and Camp-David "visitors"
most surely would still be contributors
regardless of whether
political tethers
allowed them to stay there as visitors.
It's silly to simply pretend
they gave money just to get in.
And campaign reform
to alter such norm
would make folks afraid to be friends.
To me it just wouldn't be right
to limit a First-Fam'ly's right
to simply invite
whomever they like--
non-donors and donors alike.
© 2000 If I were lucky enough to be President, I'd want to give everyone
I know a chance to stay at the White House. Assuming that such friends
would have have contributed to my campaigns, I would think it unfair for critics
to then view such visits as payoffs. I also recognize that whoever happens
to be president might (for the wrong reason) invite people who contributed
despite their not having previously been friends, but it would require the mind
of a Puritan for a critic to attempt to fairly draw such distinctions.
It's just another case in which the desired cure would be worse than the disease
just as would be nearly every proposal for campaign "reform."
You Can't Hide Those Lying
Eyes (limerick 20000913-02)
A program about anthropology
(I think "TLC" or "Discovery")
showed how people's eyes
behave when they lie:
Glance-down to contrive, then recover.
And what do they do with their eyes
when truth they are trying to find?
They look t'ward the sky
or only one side,
then answer with straight-ahead eyes.
By watching the Hill/Rick debate
just held in the big Empire State
't'was Hill'ry who'd frown
and often glance down,
and then her response she would state.
© 2000 --Inspired by observation of
the 09-13-00 debate between Rick Lazio and Hillary Clinton.
Campaign "reform"
-- Don't make it the norm (limerick 20000913-01)
I tire of folks tooting the horn
for campaigning-finance "reform"
An overnight bonus
to one who's a donor
does not show a need for "reform."
If someone who's made a donation
can't visit the boss of the nation,
such ruling would preach:
"Give up your free speech"
to stay with the boss of the nation.
Although I will surely agree,
abuses abound to be seen,
but fixing such woes
would surely impose
a cure that is worse than disease.
© 2000 --Inspired by my anger at the
continual proposals for unconstitutional campaign-finance "reform" to
"ban soft money" and my anger at the gamesmanship exhibited by both
Rick Lazio and Hillary Clinton about their respective positions on the
"evil" of "soft money."
No verbal shards on signs in your yards !
(limerick 20000902-01)
Skaneateles' Mayor opines
that yards must be free of all signs
to state owners' views
on political news
while Clinton vacations nearby.
© 2000 --Inspired by a Fox
News story about efforts of the mayor of Skaneateles, N.Y. to ensure a
pleasant vacation for the Clintons by trying to enforce an ordinance against
"political" signs in private yards.
Hillary's Retort: He
lied to a court ! (Part II**)
(limerick 20000822-01)
The man Hill'ry called a "Jew ... bastard"
has shown he's a polygraph passer
So, what is her plea?
She says don't believe
a man who's been shown as a liar.
So Rick should adopt her retort:
Don't trust men who've lied to a court.
So when you hear Willie
say good things for Hill'ry,
You'll know they are lies to ignore.
© 2000 --Inspired by an August
22, 2000, report in the New York Post Online stating that Paul Fray passed a
lie-detector test (administered by an examiner selected by the NY Post) with
respect to his statement that Hillary called him a "f___ing Jew
bastard." According to the same NY Post story, Hillary's campaign
spokesman Howard Wolfson respond to that report by saying that "[since]
Paul Fray is an admitted liar [i.e., one who admitted having presented false
documents to a court], ... we're not going to be responding to his lies
anymore." Therefore, shouldn't Hillary make the same
don't-believe-anything-he-says assertion about Bill Clinton in light of his
demonstrated pattern of lying to the Judge (and everyone else) in the Paula
Jones case?
**For Hillary's
Retort, Part I, go here. or here.
Hillary nags her clandestine JAG's
to help end her
voter-poll lag (a limerick)(du20000720-01)
I told those nice folks in my loop--
my Jewish Advisory Group
To tell the press denizens
"We're just 'concerned citizens' '
cause Fray
just cannot tell the truth."
© 2000
---Inspired by 07-20-00
ABC News report that Hillary's campaign instructed members of her
"Jewish Advisory Group" to anonymously contact members of the press
and, after identifying themselves only as "concerned citizens," to
express outrage at Fray's claims that Hillary called him an "F.J.B."
Hill'ry's Retort: Fray Lied to a Court
(limerick 20000719-01)
Defenders of Hillary say
you can't take the word of Paul Fray.
Their new retort:
He lied to a court,
and so you can't trust what he'll
say.
They point-out to no one's surprise
that he was disbarred
for such lies.
And yet they don't blink
to say they don't think
for Clinton the same rule
applies.
'Cause in his disbarment proceedings,
a brand-new defense he is pleading:
He will proclaim
his genes are to blame
'cause all lies were told by his penis.
© 2000 --Inspired by 07-18-00
Fox News publication of AP story questioning Fray's credibility by reciting,
amon other things, Fray's having surrendered his license to practice law rather
than defend charges that he submitted false documents to a court. See also
the following Daily Updates related to disbarment proceedings against Clinton:
2000-06-30 Daily Update-01 and 2000-06-30
Daily Update-02..
Hillary's lament:
"Some of my
worst friends are ex-campaign managers".
(limerick 20000718-01)
Today when Paul Fray told Fox News ...
that Hill'ry said: "You
[blanking] Jew..." .
He said he'd profess
for polygraph tests
and then he'll take truth-serum too!
So now how will Hillary prove
she only
says kind things to Jews?
To make her test better
her polygraph tester
will be the one OJ will use.
© 2000 --Inspired by
07-18-00 Fox
News story about Fray's statements to Fox News on 07-18-00 and June 9, 2000
statement by F. Lee Baily and/or O.J. Simpson indicating that OJ would take a
lie-detector test and submit to questioning on the internet.
A vast left-wing
conspiracy? (limerick
20000513-01)
We should not condone infidelity
in fam'lies with children especially.
A wife being kooky
can't justify Rudy
engaging in such infidelity.
But also one cannot ignore
her kooky behavior galore.
Like statements she made
at Cardinal John's wake
right at the cathedral's front
door.
And who's the producer who signed-her
to speak "Monologues" of
"Vagina"?
It's said by reporters
that Hill'ry's supporters
decided the star should be
Donna
And so we can't help but
suspect
that Hill'ry, whose home is a wreck,
Used her campaign
to give Donna fame,
then hang her around Rudy's neck.
Is this a conspiracy thing?
Does it have truth in its ring?
It's surely no worse
than Hill'ry's own words:
"Conspiracy by the Right Wing"
© 2000
Mike, the Confessor
about
Hillary's Mysteries (limericks
20000505-01)
Yesterday, Fox's O'Reilly
questioned Mike Wallace quite spryly.
Seeking to know
why Wallace's show
ignored Hill'ry's myst'ries entirely.
At first, Wallace echoed the choir:
"Such 'old news' has lost all its fire."
But when he was pressed,
Mike Wallace confessed
that ev'ryone knows she's a liar.
And then Mike confessed it is true,
that Hill'ry should be interviewed
But then in a ruse,
he made the excuse
that she's too estranged from the truth.
But when did Mike Wallace get tired
of
trying to show who's a liar?
For so many years,
it's been his career--
exposing folks trapped in such mire.
© 2000
("Yesterday" was 05-04-00)
Hillary's insightful
limerick as forward to her new book:
It Takes a Commune
(dedicated
to Elian Gonzales):.
Before I acquired my hauteur,
I foolishly felt quite assured
That fam'lies were best --
not government quests --
to raise kids until they
mature
But then, with my Ivey-League
Peers,
I learned that such values were "weird"
We found-out quite early
that folks over thirty
deserved nothing else but our
jeers.
They seemed to think we should feel blessed
that we had been born in the West.
Of course they were bores
who knew not the score
and we were the brightest and
best.
We told them that pigs were
their visage
and that they had plundered and pillaged
That's when I learned
they couldn't discern
that kids should be raised by a
village.
When health-care had ruined my visage,
I co-authored "It Takes a
Village"
The village knows best--
not Father Knows Best,
who offered us nothing but
lineage.
But since Elian's Mom met her
doom,
I've changed to a much better tune
Fidel knows the way,
so now I must say
that surely "It Takes a Commune."
© 2000 (du20000402-01)
Hillary Rodham Clinton's new name:
Hilliary
or Hellary
(du 2000-02-13---01)
As "Rodham" or "Clinton" she's pilloried,
and so she just
wants to be "Hill'ry"
She lied up a storm
for Hellth-Care
"Reform"
---Hil-liar-y
or maybe just Hellary
© 2000
"It's all the buzz in Albion: Hillary stiffs a
single mom" Washington
Times Headline 02-11-00.
Sounds just like Bill, to me. (du20000211)
Media/political
hype for government-funded child-care (du
2000-02-06-03)
(Can you say "taxpayer
funded"? -- Better yet, can you say "Hillary
Care")
I'm tired of the whining and frets
by couples who have kids as pets.
The proper child care
is Mom who is there--
not someone who's paid to hear frets.
Too many
women fall prey
to outlandlish notions that they
must have a career
to satisfy peers
and leave kids with strangers all day.
Why do career gals suppose
that others should pay through the nose
so they can pay less
for care they think best
so they can keep up with the Jones?
My boys
were quite lucky guys
as apples of their Mama's eyes.
She had a career
but quit without fear
to be Mom for her special guys.
She could have preferred a career
and sent them to child-care to rear,
but she knew it best
that we all have less
for them to have more of her near.
Should
one-income couples pay more
in taxes for child-care galore,
so two-income fam'lies
can sample life's candies
and pay less for child-caring chores?
Of course the right answer is "No."
So who does that leave-- Do you know?
Those two-income fam'lies
and grandads and grannies--
and college-kid's parents-- but whoa !
All in
those groups will say "No,
we just can't afford to pay mo' "
Who, then, is left
to be made bereft
for yuppies to keep up their show?
Who should be brought to their knees
to pay for such big-spending sprees?
Please don't tax me,
and do not tax thee,
just tax that guy behind the big tree
© 2000 (except last line) (Reprise
from http://polisat.com/du2000/du000229.htm#20000206-03)
(Poetic
License since New
Millennium starts 01-01-2001 and did not
start on 01-01-2000)
Just Say "No" -- Hillary's Version
(du 2000-01-20)
A questioner acting so hateful
dared ask me if I'd been unfaithful
Of course I said "Know--
you don't need to
know"--
I'm glad he can't speak Clintonimble.
He asked me if I had smoked pot,
and I said to him "Surely knot."
It isn't my fault
he thinks by default
that when I said
"knot" I meant "not."
I'm lucky that only my friends
can understand my Clintonyms.
I am so smart,
I fooled that old fart,
and everyone's
angry at him
© 2000
Hillary's Choice (of punishment for Bill)
(du 2000-01-18)
Mrs. Clinton just gave us insight
on dealing with marital strife,
To punish ole' Bill,
her choice is she will
stay with him the rest of her life
© 2000
Hillary Clinton (Hillary Rodham?) on the David Letterman
Show (du
2000-01-13)
As Letterman poked fun at Rodham,
she saw that her polls had hit bottom
Her pollsters then said,
"You'll rise from the dead
if you go on his show and can top him."
Assembling a team of good writers,
and making them pull
two all-nighters,
they wrote her some gags
to have in her bag,
but she also made some one-liners.
She showed us that she could learn how
to swing without hitting a foul.
In politics rough,
if wit were enough,
then Dole would be
President now.
© 2000
The Gail Sheehy Horse (du
1999-12-08)
Gail Sheehy can talk 'till she's hoarse
pretending that "Hillary's
Choice"
Is just a display of
Hill's feet of clay,
but it's just a big Trojan Horse.
© 1999.
Hillary's
Commitment: "I intend to run,
surely"
An example of
Rodhamonyms--
i.e.,
Rodham's
Homonyms
(Rodham's version of Clinphonics)
(19991123-01)
I
said, "I yen, tend, tour, unsurely,"
so why do folks treat me so
cruelly?
It must be that they
don't hear what I say
as I hold all
my options securely.
Why are there so many turds,
who try to twist all of my
words?
I need a new honey
and want some more money,
but not a
dull place in the 'burbs.
© 1999.
Too
Cold a Day To Go Out and Play
It
was too cold that day to go out and play
So
Hillary said "Inside I must stay"
But
Bill didn't know that out she'd not go
So
he had Lewinsky in for a _ _ _ _
But
lucky for Bill his aides spied ol' Hill
So
he told Lewinsky to cut short the thrill
As
quick as a wink he got out of the pink
Then
shut all the doors and ran to the sink
Then
into the study he shuttled his buddy
And
waited for Hill'ry, that old fuddy-duddy
© 1999.
Hillary's
Faux Pas (du19991113)
In
serving my country as Bill's diplomat,
I went to a speech by Ms. Arafat
Later
I learned upon hearing the news,
that she claimed that her people were
gassed by the Jews.
I
don't want my silence to be misconstrued,
so I'll tell you the facts from
my point of view.
In
hearing the speech by Ms. Arafat,
directly behind her I dutifully
sat.
Her
words were unclear 'tho' I listened intently,
so when she was through,
I hugged her so gently.
To
tell you the truth-- I hate to be crass--
but I thought she said "Please pardon my gas."
© 1999
Hillary's Long-Lost Lover
(Inspired by reports purporting to identify her
pre-Clinton lover)
Long
ago when I was young
my lover was an Irish-man.
We'd stroll together arm-in-arm
and then we'd frolick in a barn.
It might have been a chicken-coop
'cause we kept finding chicken poop.
It was such fun to frolick there
'til chicken poop got in our hair.
But in the barn was only par--
the greatest fun was in the car.
If only he had been ambitious,
I'd have gladly been his "Mrs."
Since it wasn't his intent
to grow up to be President,
I had to find another shill
and so I hitched my star to Bill.
Even though he was a rooster,
he also was a great self-booster.
I knew that he'd be President,
so to the barn with him I went.
Even though he was a jerk
by making me do all the work,
I didn't mind the time in bed --
he needed help to get ahead.
I toughed it out for many years
but never got to hold his ears.
I had to let him fool around
as long as we were gaining ground.
Attorney General he became
as we began our ride to fame.
And then he got elected Gov'nor
and got more gals to give him hummers.
When he became our president,
Paula said his part was bent.
But he refused to take the bait
to prove to us his part was straight.
And with this controversy growing,
Lewinski came and kept on blowing.
He managed to escape Starr's
lair
by claiming that it wasn't fair ...
to criticize philandering by
one who can't control his thing.
So by his side I always stood
as poster-girl for victimhood.
And now it's I who reach for power
while he's in his eleventh hour.
And when the sun has set on
Bill,
I'll have my power on the hill.
Then I can share my wit and charm
with my first lover in that barn.
© 1999
Take
Me Into the Poll Game
(tune of Take Me Out to the Ball Game)
Yanks
sweep '99 series
I stayed
home from the Ball Game, I stayed out of the crowd
It
was a sweep by the Yanks, you know
Now
I'm sad that I chose not to go
Cause
it's sweep, sweep, sweep by the home team
Put
Atlanta to shame
For
it's one, two, three it's a sweep in the Series Games
Take
me into the poll game, I'm in touch with the crowd
Buy
me a house and get funds from hacks
I
don't care if I never pay back
So
it's root, root, root against Ruuu-deee
If
I don't win it's a shame
For
it's one, two, three strikes he's out in the old poll game
I have
always loved Yank-eees, not to mention the Mets
Baseball
is one of my fav'rite games
Cause
you can steal without feeling ashamed
So
it's steal, steal, steal for my own team
If
I get caught it's a shame
For
it's one, two, three files I've hid in the old campaign
I just
love the Big Apple, I'm the toast of the town
Moynihan
gave me luke-warm support
He'll
soon learn that I'm not a good sport
So
it's hoot, hoot, hoot at ole Pat-rick
He's
the one that I'll blame
For
it's one, two, three times he messed-up my whole campaign
Make
me cookies from web sites criticizing my views
Give
them to hackers in my campaign
Find
the names of whoever complains
So
it's hack, hack, hack for my campaign
Send
a virus or two
For
it's one, two, three hacks, they're out, then we'll drink champagne
Get
those files from the White House, Get them for my campaign
Ken
Starr is gone so we're safe from jail
All
those files will be good for black-mail
So
it's threat, threat, threat for coercion
Send
a picture or two,
For
it's one, two, three pics, you're out of the whole campaign
Pander
to Puerto Ricans, Let those terrorists go
On
second thought better not let them go,
I
don't care if they never get out,
But
it's now too late to just say no
They're
all out on the loose
If
it's one, two, three bombs I'm sunk 'cause they're on the loose
Don't
give money to Lowey, Give those millions to me
I'm
a celeb and I need the bread
I
don't care if ole Rudy's ahead
So
its give, give, give to my campaign
I'll
withdraw when I'm rich
Only
one, two, three million bucks are just not enough
I'm
well liked as a victim, please feel sorry for me
I'm
just campaigning as therapy
Cattle
futures won't do it for me
So
just give, give, give me your money
But
don't make me stay in
'cause
it's just your money I want to be free from him
© 1999.
To
be continued.....
.
