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Political
Satire
/Commentary
Daily Updates
.™©·2003
..
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July 2, 2003:
PoliSat
.Com's
Political
Satire/
Commentary
Daily Update #
01··
™©·2003
(Not posted until July 3, 2003, due to conflicts in Editor's schedule.)
·
·
The AP reported that in New
York a bear roaming the streets led to calls for help. Who do you
call? Bear Busters! Although Kudlow and Cramer use lively debate to
"bust" the bear market psychology, Cavuto, as a devotee of the hemline
theory, often hosts Victoria's Secret models to soothe the bears.
Text version: scroll down to read.
Animated version:
Large version-- click
left image.
Small version-- click
right image.
For bears in the
street, call the tamers: Cavuto and Kudlow and Cramer.
Who're'yo' gonna call? Bear Busters!
.
.
New Yorkers today
faced a serious danger:
A bear roaming streets without trainers or tamers
The experts they mustered
demanded Bear-Busters
and summoned Cavuto and Kudlow and Cramer.
However, when Kudlow and Cramer arrived
they learned that Cavuto was broadcasting live
his bull-market Siegfrieds,
Vitcoria's Secrets
displays in his quest to bring bulls back to life.
But soon after Kudlow and Cramer had mustered
some models arrived whom by Neil had been mustered
whose thinking was stressed
from leering at guests
and thought that the callers requested bare-busters.
····
Given the fact that Victoria Secret lingerie models are Cavuto's favorite guests
on his Fox News Channel business show in his never-ending battle against
psychology of the bear market, it's a virtual certainty that any call for a Bear
Buster would be heard, and hormonally misinterpreted, by Cavuto while
interviewing a Victoria Secret lingerie model. It's a slow day for
satire. --Jim Wrenn,
Editor@PoliSat.Com.
·
Direct link
for this Update: ·
http://polisat.com/du2003/du030731.htm#20030702-01
·
™©2003
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··
July 1,
, 2003:
PoliSat
.Com's
Political
Satire/
Commentary
Daily Update #
01··
™©·2003
(Not posted until July 3, 2003, due to conflicts in Editor's
schedule.)·
·
Eureka! Attention disorder can
lead to a driving disorder.
.
This is about a "news" report claiming cell-phone owners are
"more likely" to suffer "attention disorders" and are thus
more likely to be bad drivers than people who eschew such technology.
A survey has claimed it made findings
that folks not objecting to driving
while talking by phone
are accident prone
despite whether phoning while driving.
The survey is claiming the spoiler
of talents to well-reconnoiter
the highway to drive
and safely arrive
ain't phones but attention disorders.
The grounds for this theory they've sown
were surveys of folks with those phones
admitting their minds
will wander at times
when driving without using phones.
The next startling theory they'll sow
on things that are vital to know?
For driving in rain
they're sure to explain
downhill is where water will flow.
····
Here are excerpts from a July
1, 2003, Cellular News report: " According to an analysis by the USA insurance company, Response Insurance of their national driving survey,
people who use cell phones when driving are more likely to be distracted from the road even when they are not talking on a phone. The results indicate there may be a
'distracted-driver personality' type behind the wheel."
(Italics added.) The following quotation from this "news" report
says it all about the absurdity of this survey, its premises and its
conclusions: "The Response Insurance National Driving Distractions Survey compared attentiveness of cell phone users to non-users when not talking on a phone. When asked a series of questions about different topics that might take their attention from the road, people who use cell phones were significantly more likely to be distracted when thinking about every-day issues and concerns than drivers who do not use cell phones while driving."
Is it possible that if people who don't use cell phones were to give candid
answers to such patently subjective questions, they
would admit their attention in driving is often distracted when they're thinking
about other things?
--Jim Wrenn,
Editor@PoliSat.Com.
·
Direct link
for this Update: ·
http://polisat.com/du2003/du030731.htm#20030701-01
·
™©2003
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Political-Satire Daily Updates by email | Become
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