Mar. 8, 2005--

Media world finds Dan Rather certain he did not have fraudulent relations with that source, Mrs. Maples, so he needs to get back to the work of informing the people on 60 Minutes.

            As Dan Rather prepares to formally retire as the CBS News Anchor (and in this case, "Anchor" is literally correct), the media world finds Dan Rather certain he did not have fraudulent relations with that source, Mrs. Maples, so he needs to get back to the work of informing the people on 60 Minutes.  Paraphrasing his most beloved political role model, Rather said, "I am not a partisan hack."  However, even though Rather adamantly insists he is not a politically biased reporter, most media observers know that for decades he has been a reported political bias.   When he began to Anchor CBS News decades ago, many Northeasterners doubted the country could adjust to his accent, but he soon overcame it with his unique way of communicating, which became known as Rather-Blather.

            In anticipation of Rather's retirement on March 9, 2005, PoliSat.Com's Washington Bureau Drawer Chief used PoliSat.Com's high-tech, remote-sensing equipment to capture a video clip from Dan Rather's "testimony" before the panel appointed by CBS to investigate the infamous 60 Minutes broadcast of patently fraudulent "documents" from George Bush's National Guard record.  (More on that tomorrow.)   To view the short video segment, click the large "Rather Certain" image below labeled for video clip with sound. (To view a silent version, click the smaller image to the right.)

             The doting Walter Cronkite marked the eve of Rather's retirement as an occasion to express amazement that CBS News hadn't replaced rather more than a decade ago.  PoliSat.Com was unable to reach Roger Mudd, widely recognized when Cronkite retired decades ago as the most suitable replacement for Cronkite, but, alas, Mudd had alienated the politically correct crowd at CBS News when, during his interview of Ted Kennedy during Kennedy's campaign in the 1980 primaries against Jimmy Carter, he did the unthinkable-- he asked Kennedy to do what any fair-minded reporter would have known to have been a "below the belt" question-- i.e., he asked Kennedy to explain why he wanted to be president.  Of course Kennedy's embarrassing inability to answer the question all but destroyed his chances against even the feckless Jimmy Carter, and, of course, Mudd's having deigned to ask such a question planted great anxiety in the minds of the brass at CBS News that Mudd might not be a "team player" or might even be a potentially future red-stater.  

            The burning question today is whether Rather's parting words will paraphrase another great line from his political role-model:  "Well, you won't have Dan Rather to kick around anymore."  Or, will he paraphrase Douglas MacArthur:  "Old Anchors never die, they just drag the ships to the bottom."

--Jim Wrenn, Editor at PoliSat.Com.

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Mar. 8, 2005 #01 Daily Update at PoliSat.Com, where satire is always commentary, but commentary isn't always satire

Title:  Rather Certain.

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