Hillary 2008 Super Bowl Wardrobe Malfunction as stand-in for Janet Jackson falls short of being her breast performance and thus fails to provide the lift Bill Clinton predicted.

Hillary 2008 Super Bowl Wardrobe Malfunction as stand-in for Janet Jackson falls short of being her breast performance and thus fails to provide the lift Bill Clinton predicted..·

By Jim Wrenn,
Editor and Washington Bureau Drawer Chief at PoliSat.Com.
January 30, 2008--

While there's much discussion in the media about Hillary Clinton's campaign putting Bill Clinton on a shorter leash, inside the campaign Bill is still calling the shots. Believing that the media have now tagged Hillary as being "too white, too old and too un-sexy," and remembering that Janet Jackson had previously expressed her support for Hillary, he arranged for Hillary and himself to join Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake for a 2008 reprise of the "wardrobe malfunction" half-time show. This year's show will feature new high-tech special effects such that with both couples "on the stage," it will appear that "Jackson and Timberlake" "morph" into "Hillary and Bill" before performance of the "wardrobe malfunction" by Bill and Hillary.

Bill thinks this is necessary to enable Hillary to regain the reputation of being "sexy" as she was described by Sharon Stone. Bill said that many months ago, Hillary had reinforced her "sex-goddess" image by exposing her cleavage while giving a speech in the Senate and by wearing an extremely skimpy costume in singing a political duet with Barack Obama titled "I Knock You Babe." But the Washington Post tried to destroy that image by publishing a doctored photo of a haggard old white woman purporting to be Hillary. Said Bill, "Why, she looks better than that on her worst day."

When a society columnist asked Bill whether Hillary had undergone "reconstructive surgery," he turned angry and said, "Don't you think they'd be a lot bigger if she'd done that?" The reporter then explained she was referring to facial surgery rather than breast augmentation.

Meanwhile, Bill was getting ready to perform an Al Jolsen imitation to remind everyone that he was he "first black president," and that Hillary had really been the "First Black First Lady." "Not even Oprah can claim that," he added.

Through the excellent sources of PoliSat.Com's Washington Bureau Drawer Chief, we have obtained a copy of the video of Hillary's 2008 Super Bowl Wardrobe Malfunction (see above -right), and a larger, better quality version is here.

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Additional versions (both wmv and YouTube formats) for other sizes and connection speeds are here. The obvious question that everyone has before watching the video is: "Are they real," but those who've watched the video say such question is irrelevant and inapplicable.

How, or whether, this "wardrobe malfunction" will affect the campaign is yet to be seen. Some say it's "unbecoming" a "First Lady," but others point out that Virginia's flag depicts a woman with a bear breast defeating a tyrant. Also, don't forget the bare-breasted "Spirit of Justice" statue that John Ashcroft hid behind some blue curtains. Said Bill, "The beauty of bare breasts is in the eye of the older."