Palin acceptance speech as running mate for McCain fails to refute media reports accusing her of
contributing to Global Warming in the Artic.·
Editor and Washington Bureau Drawer Chief at PoliSat.Com.
September 4, 2008--
Although Sarah Palin's acceptance speech enthralled the Republican delegates, it failed to refute
persistent news media reports that she has contributed to Global Warming in the Artic. A
non-partisan group of climate experts, Progressive Scientists Extolling Unverifiable Data Operations
(PSEUDO), said that by producing five children she more than quintupled the carbon-footprint damage
to the environment created by the mere existence of a "average" American family with 1.4
parents and 1.6 children.
"But there's more," said the PSEUDO spokes-being. To elaborate, he said that
"for many years" Palin herself had contributed to the melting of glaciers by her frequent
practice of entering the pristine wilderness to hunt caribou and moose. According to PSEUDO's
Director of Infrared Studies, Patten Ahnsentz, the scientific acronym for this phenomenon is
When asked to explain the acronym, he said it stands for "The Extremely Hot Babe Effect Of
Palin's Environmental Conduct." To buttress this theory, he released a satellite photo
showing patterns of glacial melting matching a superimposed composite image of the exact coordinates
walked by Palin on every hunting trip since she began hunting at age 18 months.
When a right-wing zealot disguised as a "reporter" asked him how he could claim such
satellite imagery as "proof" that Palin's hunting trips caused such glacial melting,
Ahnsentz distributed to the eager reporters a photographic image showing glacial melting occurring
in the immediate wake of Palin stalking a caribou. As he distributed the photograph to the
press, he stressed that it was "not photo-shopped."
Wrenn, Editor at PoliSat.Com.
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