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Al Gore's problem-solving success with Gorbel's Cube during "Earth Hour Lights Out" inspires plan for "Earth Decade Lights Out."·
By Jim
Wrenn,
Editor and Washington Bureau Drawer Chief at PoliSat.Com.
April 4, 2008--
Heartened by the astonishing success of "lights out" for the inaugural "Earth Hour" on March 29, 2008, Al Gore, the attentive Husband of Mother Earth, has invented The Gorbel's Cube under his latest pseudonym, "Gorbel," to inspire inauguration an "Earth Decade Lights Out." The pseudonym "Gorbel" is but the latest in a long list of Al Gore's pseudonyms that help promote his "Man is Getting Mother Earth Too Hot" theory that condemns what he says virtually all scientists not believing in a "flat earth" recognize as a form of "anthropomorphic incestuousness" in which the Rabid Right Wing continually "gropes" Mother Earth to get her "hot." Indeed, it was the blockbuster movie, "The Da Gorgle Code" (a prequel to "Inconvenient Truth") that revealed that just as Superman posed as the mere mortal "Clark Kent" to conceal his secret identity, "Al Gore" has always been the name used to protect Gore's secret identity as "Da Gorgle," the First Husband of Mother Earth.
Gore explained that until even recently, many humans -- especially Right Wing Men-- perceived Mother
Earth as "flat," but thanks to Gore's
Silicon Science, it's now beyond debate that not only is Mother Earth not flat, she's
really quite round. Indeed, he even distributed some "before"
and "after" pictures to prove it. Nevertheless, many die-hard Right
Wingers refuse to believe the roundness of Mother Earth is "real." But Bill
Clinton-- in a rare example of recent agreement with Al Gore-- said his "hands on"
experience with Mother Earth made it obvious that her roundness is real. (However, an Obama
Campaign spokesperson, speaking on condition of anonymity, said Clinton was confusing "Mother
Earth" with an intern for Mother Earth.)
Meanwhile, both John McCain and Joe Lieberman denied rumors that they had each just bought The Gorbel's Cube, lock, stock and barrel. The rumors were fed by speculation that if McCain and Lieberman could gain control of Gore's lucrative Carbon Credits enterprise, then McCain's fundraising problems would be over because he'd be nearly as wealthy as George Soros.
Finally, a spokesperson for Bill Clinton denied the rampant rumors that he's been trying to all the lurid pictures of Mother Earth that he and Gore used to enjoy in the White House when Hillary and Tipper were away. That was back in the days when Al and Bill were on good terms. Now Bill's fear is that if the pictures were to fall into the wrong hands, someone might superimpose Hillary's face on one of the unflattering pictures of Mother Earth.
--Jim Wrenn, Washington Bureau Drawer Chief at PoliSat.Com.
Permanent links to this installment:
http://polisat.com/DailyPoliticalSatire-Commentary/Archives2008/du20y08m04d04-01.htm
or
http://PoliSat.Com/MotherEarth.htm.
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end.